Had lunch with MHH, my first Mixed Doubles Hyrox partner, after training today. Went to Er Mei, a Sichuan restaurant in Chinatown, which I had never tried before. I think this might be the first time we’ve hung out just the two of us.

We had a nice chat. He asked me about the friction with a gym group member, which I had mentioned at the Christmas drinks, and I shared a bit of the context. He shared some of his experiences of feeling slighted and how he dealt with it, and the outcomes. He commented that we are a strange group, which I chuckled at – so true! He seems to be more willing to call things out, than perhaps I necessarily do. Although, he clearly does pick his battles as well. I acknowledged that I don’t really like confrontation, have an avoidant style, and am poor in communication, which obviously doesn’t help matters.

He’s quite empathetic, observant, and good at reading people – or at least on the latter, maybe it is because we have somewhat similar views on people. I wonder if it’s because he’s in the hospitality industry, so he is used to a wide range of people and situations, and attuned to picking up social cues, as part of his job. Or maybe because he is gay? Or has been through some challenges in life, which resonate with me? I find it easy to talk to him, and he has a reassuring effect on me. I think part of it is that he is a kind person, and another part is that I think he understands me, and ‘sees’ me, and I feel accepted as I am, flaws and all. He is probably also good at communicating, or addressing thorny issues in a way that doesn’t get me feeling defensive.

During our discussion, he suddenly asked me a question, which I found interesting and quite insightful of him. I replied and acknowledged his insight, although it was only later on, that I realised that I probably understated my response.

As we were chatting, I also mentioned that I haven’t bought a bed for O yet, and he is still sleeping on a mattress on the floor, because the bed we had ordered for O twice, never arrived, and the order was cancelled twice. And I never really followed up partly because I don’t know how I would build the bed, and he very kindly offered to come over and help me build the bed if I order and get it delivered. It’s so lovely of him.